A few weeks ago at JV Alert Live in Philadelphia, I witnessed the power of storytelling in its purest form.
Candid, emotional, and best of all… unscripted.
(The disclaimer here is that when you write or tell stories for your marketing please practice the structure and flow BEFOREHAND so that you’re not boring your audience. Understand what the setup, climax, and conclusion are BEFORE you start. It’ll save you and your listeners/readers a lot of time and boredom.)
But the story I witnessed at JV Alert was heart wrenchingly real and undiluted because it came out of left field. And it came from the heart.
Here’s what went down:
During the copywriter’s panel, the audience had a chance to go up to the microphone and ask the copywriters their questions.
One gentleman got up to the mic and began asking his question.
But here’s the interesting thing about this guy.
In the entertainment industry, some actors are “typecast” because of the way they look. Some actors never get out of a “tough guy” role or a “teeny-bopper” character because they simply look a certain way, and producers always cast them in the same roles.
Well this guy looked like your typical, gruff, New Yorker.
And to top it all off, when he began speaking, he had a THICK Brooklyn accent.
I’m not joking.
He just looked, and sounded like a tough guy from the streets of New Yawk.
So this “tough guy” said that his business was helping people cope with divorce so that the transition was smooth for the children involved.
But his specialty was helping men during a divorce, because according to him, many times a judge will award custody of the children to the mother, regardless of what records show and what evidence is presented.
He was fighting for a fair rap for divorced dads.
Okay, so all this sounded honorable and good.
But the thing is there was no emotion behind it, no mojo, no juiciness.
The guy was flat, and everyone could sense it. He was still the tough guy character.
So finally, one of the copywriters on stage, my friend Vin Montello I think it was, suddenly says, “Hey… so what makes YOU qualified to help divorced fathers who are suffering from an unjust court system and perhaps have negligent ex wives who aren’t fit for custody, and are actually hurting the child in the process?”
Silence.
After a few moments the guy clears his throat and says in a small voice, “Well, because it happened to ME…”
Suddenly, everyone in the room perked up and leaned forward to hear what this guy had to say.
Here was his story:
“You see, my ex-wife was absolutely unfit to take custody of our son, who was around 5 at the time we got divorced. We split our time with him.
But even then, she was never around for him, she would forget it was her weekend to take care of him, and was always thinking about herself, and not his welfare.
One night I was working late in the city because she was supposed to take him to her place for the weekend, and had promised to pick him up to go to the movies and dinner.
He was really excited because despite all the times she had hurt him in the past, he still loved her… she was his mother, you know?
So they were going to watch Toy Story or something like that and eat at his favorite place, and he was just about jumping off the walls.
At around 7pm I get a call from my mother who tells me that my ex-wife had called her saying that she couldn’t make it after all, with no explanation.
My mother tells me that since my son had heard the news, he had started crying hysterically, and hadn’t stopped.
She told me to come home right away because she was worried about him.”
Here the guy stopped and clenched his fists to his heart to make his point.
“You don’t understand how helpless I felt. I grabbed my briefcase and raced out of my office, but it still took me an hour to get home with all the traffic. It was torture every minute of the way.
As soon as I got home I jumped out of the car while it was still running and raced up the driveway.
As I happened to look up at his room… I saw his little face at the window, still crying, but still looking to see if his mom was coming to take him to eat dinner and watch a movie.
He was still waiting for her… and all I could see was his little hands on the window and his face pressed against the glass. Just his little hands on the window…”
Here he drew in a shaky breath and composed himself before going on.
“I went up to his room and told him that I was going to take him to the movie and dinner. That mommy wasn’t coming tonight, and that I was so sorry.
It took me over an hour to get him to stop crying… all he wanted was to spend some time with his mommy…”
Another deep breath.
“And at that moment, I promised myself, I promised my son, and I promised GOD that I would do whatever I could in my power to make sure that no other children from broken homes would have to feel this way, and that no other divorced fathers AND mothers would have to deal with negligent ex-spouses…
And THAT is what Single Parent Power is all about.”
I swear the gravity got sucked out of the room.
Women were sniffling.
Men were actually misty eyed.
One of the copywriters on the panel said, “THAT… is your story that you must put into ALL your marketing, ALL your copy, and ALL of your verbal presentations!”
The no longer typecast New Yorker replied that he had a hard time telling it because he felt so vulnerable and choked up every time he told it.
But it is exactly that level of intimacy that your prospects want from you. They WANT to know that you’ve been there before. That you’ve walked the same roads and shed the same tears.
And if you can prove it with a personal story, it’s one of the most powerful rapport building and trust building techniques that you can have at your disposal.
I’ve probably said this before but… find your story.
It will serve you well.
-James D. Lee
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